A Handful of Years

SSH and I tied the knot five years ago today. I’ve been thinking about how I wanted to do an anniversary post, and I’m really not sure where I want to go with it (particularly since he doesn’t read the blog that often). I know I’m planning on writing him a love note, since it’s that sort of day (a real one, not an email one like I usually send).

The last year has been pretty rough for us both.

I can only imagine the kind of things he’s gone through as I’ve been through repeated doctors, medicines that made me crazy or sick, chronic pain, breakdowns, mental instability and a bunch of other really un-fun sorts of things. I also can’t imagine how I’d have gotten through all of that without him. He’s been my rock through all of this, even when it was as confusing for him as it was for me. I’ve been reminded over and over again how lucky I am to have him and get to be with him.

It sounds cheesy, but it’s really true.

When you say “for better or for worse” and “in sickness and in health” you don’t really expect the sickness and the worse.

I know I didn’t. And I really didn’t expect it to be “my fault”. I know there’s no blame involved, but on some level it bothers me that I’m the one that got sick. (I’m working on getting over that.) Part of what makes me so grateful and thankful and happy to be with him is knowing that our relationship survived a really big helping of “worse”. It took a lot of work from both of us, but we made it. I try to make sure he always knows how much I appreciate him and what he does for us.

So here’s to five years.

Our first handful, hopefully of many.