Therapy in 2019

My therapy appointment this week consisted of talking about:

  • how fucked we are by climate change
  • how infuriating it is that we’ve known that this was coming since the 70’s and nobody did anything about it except kick the can down the road until we’re so fucked that we can’t stop
  • how infuriating it is that the world wants to say “turn up your AC and recycle” as if 90% of carbon emissions didn’t come from big businesses and not personal consumption
  • how fucked the news and political climate is
  • how it’s impossible to plan for anything because nothing is normal right now
  • how powerless we are to make any kind of change
  • how paralyzing it is to be in a position where your life and livelihood are in danger and you have only the barest hint of influence as to whether or not you can continue to live
  • what I will do when the American economy collapses enough that I can no longer get my psych meds that keep my mood stable enough for me to be able to hold down a job
  • how do we live our values in a way that is consistent with our higher selves when we are essentially complicit in so much abject horror – even if we are “doing the right things” and writing our congresscritters and calling and phone banking
  • how long it will take for the forced-birth movement to take hold in Texas, and whether I’ll be able to get another IUD when I turn 44 or if I’ll have to hope I’m living somewhere else
  • that maybe my persistent suicidal ideation and anxiety issues are because human brains aren’t designed to deal with this level of meta-crisis that’s been steadily increasing