(warning: this story is not for the feint of skin conditions)

So for good luck, on May Day, one is supposed to go out and frolic and wash your face with the May morning dew. This is supposed to ensure beautiful, radiant skin all year.

I figure if getting up early enough to take a dewy frolic is enough to make for happy skin, I’ll try it. (My acne-prone skin will take all the help it can get.) Also, the garden needed watering, so I went and did that too. This meant that I was up and about around 7:30, which isn’t all that early, plus hey – naps rock.

Now, I live in a subdivision – an older one, but with many houses nonetheless. So even though I have a large-ish lot (just over 1/3 acre), there are neighbors in view. As such, my pyjamas just weren’t going to cut it as outdoor wear. Instead, I threw on a cute flower-print sundress.

It is important to the story that I mention I was ONLY wearing the cute flower-print sundress.

I went out and turned on the sprinkler in the front yard, properly clothed in my cute sundress, my hair looking as though I’d combed it with an eggbeater (curly hair + mornings = awesome). And then I went back through the house to water in the back.

As I passed by the garden cabinet on the porch I thought “Hmmm… You know, it’s Mosquito season, I might want some bug spray, and I’ve not showered yet, so I won’t stink of DEET at work.” I hosed down my arms and legs with the stuff and went out for the appropriate frolic/dew bath/garden tending. It wasn’t very sunny, but it was warm and breezy and quite nice.

(If you’ve not frolicked recently, I highly recommend it. I felt rather silly at first, twirling around like a top… but also felt very giggly and rather happy by the end of it. Plus, nobody could see me anyway, except the neighbor’s dog, who was completely uninterested in the batshit hippie next door.)

Having returned to the house with dewy feet, satisfied that the garden wouldn’t wilt, I discovered the one, utter, uncomfortable flaw in my plan.

I now have no less than four mosquito bites on my left butt cheek, plus one on the right for good measure.

And I have to go to work this evening.

/scratches